


somnambulating

by felixir_of_youth



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Gen, Golden Deer!Felix, M/M, Pre-Slash, Timeline: Preskip, commission for a friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2021-01-24 10:47:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21336985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felixir_of_youth/pseuds/felixir_of_youth
Summary: A few vignettes: Felix's ruminations after joining the Golden Deer. Dimitri's inability to articulate his feelings. Oh, and Claude's there, too.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	somnambulating

**Author's Note:**

> the original prompt: "Golden deer route where felix gets recruited into golden deer and he sees dimitri again a few weeks after that ( could be dining hall, training hall, hallway of their dorm rooms etc )? Perhaps deep / heated conversations happen between the two."
> 
> thank you so much, cassi, for supporting me!

Claude von Riegan, the mysterious heir and silver-tongued archer: Dimitri is convinced that his guile was, in part, responsible for Felix’s departure from the Blue Lions.

Is he bitter? Perhaps. Will he dwell upon it? Most certainly.

A piping hot cup of chamomile (courtesy of Dedue) rests between his hands. Dimitri stares and he stares, willing answers from flower petals and tea leaves. He purses his lips. Curses under his breath.

“What are you seething about? Did Hanneman give you another earful about handling your books with more care?”

Dimitri startles and drops his tea, shattering the cup in the process. He scoots away from the ceramic shards and shoots Felix a glare that’d give Seteth a run for his money. “Can’t you see that I was trying to enjoy my afternoon without interruption?”

Rather than scoff, Felix reacts with a grimace and a sigh. “Do me a favor: Try not to do my job for me.”

“I beg your pardon?” Dimitri retorts, frustration underlining his words.

“You and I both know you need someone to keep you in line. Byleth’s got his hands full dealing with Claude and Hilda’s nonsense, so it falls to me to keep tabs on you. I don’t trust Dedue to do it, and Ashe is head-over-heels for you.”

It’s the most Felix has ever said to him in the past month and the tempest of revelations leaves Dimitri speechless.

The pregnant pause elicits a scowl from Felix. He purses his lips and looks away, as if expectant. (But of what, pray tell?)

“... Felix, answer me this. Why did you leave?”

“You mean, why did I join the Deers?”

“No, I want to know why you left.”

Fire burns within Felix’s eyes. “I think you already know the answer to that,  _ Boar _ .”

If he did, he wouldn’t have asked: Dimitri lets Felix off with a sigh and pulls out a handkerchief (also courtesy of Dedue) from his pocket. With all the patience he can muster, he dabs at the tea still dribbling onto the ground.

“Was it because of Byleth? Or Claude, perhaps?” Dimitri dares to ask, despite not wanting to know the answer.

And to his surprise, Felix answers in the negative: “No. I left because of you.”

“So then, I truly am so horrid that you’d do anything to avoid my presence,” he murmurs, shoulders tensing once more as he waits with anxious bated breath.

“Stop. Just stop it.”

“Stop what,” Dimitri echoes.

“Stop putting words in my mouth! Stop acting as though you don’t remember what you did! You, you’re nothing but a pale imitation of a man I was once proud to call my friend!” And with that said, Felix takes off for the training grounds, stomping through a crowd of students who all balk before his wake.

Dimitri opens his mouth, only to remember that Felix won’t hear him: “Am I nothing but a ghost to you?”

* * *

“Hey, Felix, why so dour?” Claude plops down beside everyone’s favorite swordsman and holds out a muffin he had procured from the dining hall none too long ago.

“I don’t like sweets,” Felix mutters, “But the gesture’s appreciated.” He leans back and rests against the stone brick wall, peering up into the starry night sky littered with superstitious wishes ready to be made. Yeah, sure, as if he believed any of that.

“Lemme guess, His Princeliness and you had another ‘altercation’ while I was helping Bernie restring her bow.” Claude bites into his muffin as though it’d keep Manuela away.

Felix groans. “How do you—never mind, I know better than to expect anything less. ...it’s really that obvious, between the two of us?”

“Uh huh. It’s really that obvious.”

Felix scoffs. But. The vexation lasts but a minute. Before he knows it, his expression has twisted into something far more solemn: “It’s funny, how someone you hold dear can change overnight. I guess that’s what it means to grow up. You think you know everything, then it hits you. Everything’s just. Fleeting.”

Fleeting is a good way of putting it.

“Well, that’s… it’s better than being dead, isn’t it? To still be able to feel the rain across your cheeks, to still be able to see the stars twinkle in the sky, those little things—they add up, don’t they?”

“Maybe.” Reticent as ever, Felix shrugs off Claude’s suggestion.

“Yeah, well, good pep talk. You gonna be okay if I leave you be?”

Instead of a verbal acknowledgement, Claude gets a curt wave-off. He laughs at that and leaves the matter be.

* * *

Forgiveness. Closure. They seem like such lofty ideas now, Dimitri muses to himself, lost in his own little world. He wishes he knew what to say—no, he wishes there were words in the first place.

But every time he so much as breathes, it sends Felix into a tirade about this and that. And it’s always the same this or that.

So really, he’s at a loss for how to proceed—

“We need to talk,” Felix declares as he strides into the knights’ hall.

Dimitri averts his gaze towards the flickering fire to his right. With a deep breath, he turns to Felix and nods briefly. Tersely. “Pray tell, what is it this time?”

“Are you really going to hold it against me? For joining the Deers.”

(For abandoning me?) Dimitri purses his lips. “I—no, of course not.”

“I’m not convinced. I doubt you’ve managed to convince yourself even.”

True. But that’s besides the point. What does it matter to Felix? “If you’re so knowledgable about my feelings on the matter, please, by all means, enlighten me.”

“There’s this hunger in your eyes. It’s monstrous.”

Dimitri stiffens at that, tense with both denial and disbelief.

Before he can say a word, before he can launch into a tirade of his own, before he can even deck Felix across the jaw for such an accusation, Felix just marches away.


End file.
